Dave's Cameraphone

The little bit of software that I use to send photos to this thing has bust. I don't know what's wrong with it, so until I can be bothered to try and fix it, you'll have to make do with a bit of good old-fashioned text.

Last night was spent in the Engine Shed - our new, and rather fantastic, SU bar. A good time was had by all.

Until the drama of the lollipop.

Good god, it's the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. There I am, chatting away, when I brush into this fella. Happens all the time - it's a crowded place. Tragically, this collision - if you can even call it that - had meant that this bloke had dropped his lollipop. Yes, this big, hard, rugby playing bloke. Lollipop. Right mate.

I did the usual "ah sorry mate" and tried to make a joke of it.

"Get me a fucking lollipop"
"No"
"Get me a fucking lollipop"
"No"

This went on for ages. It started to get a little heated. My two bodyguards stepped in when they realised that this guy was a bit of a idiot and had lots of mates with him.

Long story short, it all kicked off. We were told to take it outside, which we did, and the remainder of the evening was spent trying to stop Nick - our mate - from destroying the lollipop lady.

But I mean come on. It was all over a lollipop. A lollipop! You'd think I'd just stolen his first born. What a tool.

Posted by Bloke at 6:08 PM | Permalink | Comments

It was just me and Nick in the living room. TV was on. Bit bored. I asked Nick to write a song. He laughed...and shouted the words, "I saw a panda standing there" as potential lyrics.

The Multi-Racial Panda song was born.

Matt contributed the line "and a subtle stare", which got the ball rolling. This wasn't going to be comedy. Oh no. This song had to be a statement of epic proportions. What did this fat Panda represent? How was this panda going to change our lives?

Let me tell you.

A Panda is neither black nor white. It's both. So who better to ask, in this day and age, about racial integration and acceptance? Exactly.

But...just as we're about to find out what advice he's giving us, the Panda, tragically, gets shot. In the head. By a human...no doubt for his fur. Little did that human know that the panda could have saved us all. He was just trying to make some quick money for himself. Just like the rest of humanity.

Let that be a lesson to ya.

So, ladies and gents, without further a-do, we present to you 'Multi-Racial Panda', performed by (from left to right), Matt, Dave, Ant and Nick. The lyrics are below...so you can sing along.

Go watch the video on YouTube

------

I saw a Panda,
He was standing there.
He had padded feet,
And a subtle stare.

The panda he turned to me,
He says how can you really be free?
You argue over black or white,
Maybe you should learn from me

Multi-Racial Panda,
Teach us all you know,
About life and loving,
We've got some way to go
(x2)

Just as he was telling me,
A hunter appears behind a tree.
And though the panda he did run
He couldn't escape humanity's gun

Multi-Racial Panda,
You could have saved us all
But instead we've killed you
Racists made us fall.

Labels: panda

Posted by Bloke at 7:11 AM | Permalink | Comments

Gotta admit, I'm getting a little addicted to the 'look a bit grumpy in the mirror' style of pics. I used to laugh at people who did it...but now I think it's quite fun.

I don't normally look THIS miserable.

Posted by Bloke at 6:55 PM | Permalink | Comments

It's a lie! A con!

Why is it that every Sports Soccer shop is closing down...? They never do. Five days to go. They said that five days ago.

In protest, Stu and Nick stole the sign. It's now in our living room! Minus a bit of G. Nevermind.

5 days to go!!

Posted by Bloke at 3:43 PM | Permalink | Comments

No photo today, just my entry in the British Library Blog project thing:

A 9am start is always a blessing in disguise for me. I hate them, but I know that it'll spur me into a very productive day. Having said that, my day wasn't particually productive in a satisfying sense, it was more a case of just getting things done that I should have a long time ago.

You see, laziness is a killer. I'm a student, and although before I came to university I made the decision to repel the student stereotype of being a layabout, I've found myself slipping into it perfectly. Today was catch up day.

I did my washing and cleaned my room. Seems like a fairly easy task, but when the volume of cleaning up was as fearsome as it was, it really was a day well spent sorting things.

The evening saw me stewarding at Lincoln City Football Club. They were playing Grimsby Town, local rivals, so we were expecting a bit of a dodgy reception. Wasn't too bad, it was all good fun. Same can't be said for the game, sadly. It was a shocking display of professional football. Grimsby won on penalties. Who cares.

My day is ending slowly. A bit of a late night internet session, and then bed. I'm on a bit of an alcohol free diet after seeing just how many cans were rounded up in the room-tidy today. Breweries would struggle to have that many cans lying around. Shocking.

Posted by Bloke at 3:12 PM | Permalink | Comments

Ten points for whoever can guess what is in this awful, awful cocktail.

Edit: Which reminds me...you don't have to be registered to post comments here anymore. I know how bloody annoying that must have been (which, presumably, is why I didn't get any comments. You buggers.)

Posted by Bloke at 8:28 AM | Permalink | Comments

Well obviously I didn't take this. But Michael Jackson is back in the studio. This is a good thing. A very good thing indeed.

To Michael's right is that bloke from the Black Eyed Peas, who he's apparently working with. This is a bad thing. A very bad thing indeed.

Who knows what will happen.

Posted by Bloke at 5:16 PM | Permalink | Comments

Left to right: Gemma, Laura and me looking a bit...well...heavenly. Why am I so bright?!

(Lets not mention my fat double chin.)

Posted by Bloke at 8:44 AM | Permalink | Comments

The laziest game of Eye-Toy ever played. Andy is visiting the lovely Lincoln.

Posted by Bloke at 7:11 PM | Permalink | Comments

It never moved. We left.

Posted by Bloke at 3:04 PM | Permalink | Comments

Nick.

Posted by Bloke at 5:48 AM | Permalink | Comments

Anyone recognise this guy? Apparently he was in Coronation Street...but we all just remember him as the guy who did the "I said you buy one, you get one free!" ads for Safestyle UK.

This was in The Mitre pub in Lincoln. I said if he posed for a photo we'd leave him alone. Nice chap he was.

Posted by Bloke at 5:44 AM | Permalink | Comments

M: "You can't put that much in there!"
N: "Yeah I can"
M: "No! It'll overfill it! Do it in two loads"
N: "Nah, can't be bothered"
D: "Yeah..too boring!"
M: "Too boring?! It's not like you sit there and watch it, is it?"
N: "Yeah it is."

Eager to prove a point, we sat and watched Nick's washing.

Posted by Bloke at 5:11 AM | Permalink | Comments

Posted by Bloke at 5:00 AM | Permalink | Comments